Next week Lisa in Port Hope will be hosting.
The Sunnyside of the Matter
The past six months have been difficult for me. My near ten year old son Duncan has Aperger's Syndrome. He was diagnosed 4 years ago. He finds it hard to socialise, coordinate his body in sports and he asks a lot of strange and unrelated questions of people.
Until this year he has been oblivious to the fact that he is different from his peers. But he is certainly aware of it now. Being deliberately left out of play by his own soccer team, realising that even the new boys in his class are accepted into the group even when he still isn't, not being invited to parties or over to other people's houses to play have all taken their toll. We 've had a few tear-filled talks these past two weeks.
As a parent it has been so heartbreaking to watch. I feel broken myself because few of the parents have been willing to include him either. They are my peers. They have made me feel stupid for even getting upset about it. I hate the injustice of it all.
So here is my attempt to lighten my heart. With a little of Kate Spain's Sunnyside line in four mini charm packs.
Out of all of her lines, this is the one that is most ME. I love the designs and the colour scheme - orange, dark blue, grey and blue/grey - in particular.
Thank goodness that fabric can be such a ray of sunshine.
Linky Party below.
My heart aches to read that. My son doesn't have Asperger's, but he is definitely unlike his classmates, and I know the feeling of sitting and listening to them spill their aches and hurts and confusion at how people treat them and how they feel about it, while sitting with them at night. As a mother it breaks my heart and makes me feel both hurt and frustrated. I always wish I could somehow SHOW them how special and how wonderful this little being is... if they could only see it, then surely they would love him like I do! I know you must feel that way as well and I really hope that with the love and support of a good family, and the good friends he will someday find, your son creates a niche in the world and a group of people who understand and accept him. It is particularly sad to hear that your peers have not been as caring and understanding as one would expect, and at this hardest time - as you watch him become aware that he is different :^(
ReplyDeleteBut, on a brighter note - your choice in fabrics is gorgeous, and you're right, it's amazing how fabric really can lighten the heart a little. I think it is the potential in each scrap, the idea that with your help and your creativity, that fabric can be made into something beautiful and functional and expressive. I hope this fabric helps you to express yourself and your story; and I hope that the load on both you and your son's hearts is lightened over the coming months.
I'm sorry to hear you and your son are having a difficult time. Sending good vibes your way. I am glad you found some happy fabric to help cheer you up a bit :)
ReplyDeleteI, too, read your entry with a broken heart and lots of remembrances. My son has dyslexia. His own high school coach called him Waffles because he was always on the fence whether he'd pass his classes and be able to play basketball or not. I can joyfully say that now at 23 he is one of the most mature young men I know. He takes extra care to include everyone. I hope the same happy ending (although the trials never cease, coping just becomes easier) for you and your son.
ReplyDeleteI have a friend with Aspergers, and he is wonderful! He has these awesome strengths and such a sweet character, and I'm so happy to know him. That being said, he has told me that it was very difficult growing up, but that his parents were always very loving and supporting and overall amazing, and they got him through his rough spots. I'm so thankful and glad your son has a loving family to be there for him. That is so very important.
ReplyDeleteAnd I'm glad you got some Sunnyside! I think it's my favorite of her lines. I keep meaning to pick up a few charm packs. I better get on that! :)
Seriously, in this day and age, how can people be so cruel? Small-minded people make me cross ... thank goodness he has you! xx
ReplyDeleteAs a teacher, my heart breaks for you. My class and I were just having a class meeting about including everyone regardless of who and how they are. I hope things will get better. Sending you quilty love from the other side of the world.
ReplyDeleteI think our kids' hardships are equally hard on us as parents as it is on our kids. Be strong Fiona; be an advocate for your son and an educator to those around you. Your experience and knowledge can be of help to others.
ReplyDeletesending you hugs Fiona & little man xxx
ReplyDeleteI can't imagine how hard this is for you, but am so glad there is some brightness in your day. Thinking of you and your boy xx
ReplyDeleteMy heart breaks for you and your son.
ReplyDeleteMy heart also breaks for you. Unfortunately, I know exactly how you feel. My son has his share of diagnosis - ADHD, ODD, RAD. All of them come with their own issues and challenges. The most difficult to accept and live with is the alienation of peers and community, from the diagnosis themselves and the resulting behaviors. So we craft. Your son is forntunate to have you as his personal cheerleader. Love and hugs.
ReplyDeleteI'm very sorry to read about the difficulties you and your son are going through. It's so sad that people can be so ignorant and such a shame that you don't have the support of other parents around you as that's so important. I really hope that things start to improve soon. In the meantime I'm glad you have some pretty fabrics to bring a bit of sunshine :)
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry to hear about what you and your son are going through. That is so horrible. I do not understand how people can not be accepting of the differences. We are all different. I am so happy this fabric adds some glimmer of sunshine to your day :-)
ReplyDeleteWe appreciate you hosting and sharing every week....thank you.
so sad to hear this. I think the most important thing we can teach our kids is how to look out for those who are not included and show them some love and care. My heart breaks for you, but his family is who he needs right now and it is so wonderful that he has a family who loves him so much xx
ReplyDeleteOh I'm so very sorry to hear this. It must be so hard for your son and heart breaking for you. He's lucky to have a mum like you who loves him so much. Could you try and arrange a few play dates at your house? And hopefully things will get reciprocated? My heart goes out to you. I hope you get to find a few spare moments to use your gorgeous fabrics to make something beautiful. Sarah x
ReplyDeleteBreaks my heart to hear this. Sometimes these type things seem to be impossible; but we know that all things are possible with God, nothing is too hard for Him. Jesus not only died for our sins on the cross but the stripes He took on His back were for our healing. His Word says, "Many are the afflictions of the righteous but He delivers us out of them ALL." I know it's hard while you are in your trial to have faith, so I will have faith for you and praying others will join me in praying and believing for Duncan to be healed.
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